It may happen to you at one time or another. A person will seem to be avoiding you. When you look their way, they look in the other direction. When you walk toward them they quickly turn and go the other way. Are you just imagining things? You will wonder if you have offended them somehow. You will begin to consider what you might have done that annoyed them. You begin to imagine that you know what they are probably thinking. But the truth is you are telling yourself stories. You really do not know for certain what they are thinking. You try to talk yourself out of feeling the way they are making you feel. You come to the conclusion that you haven't done anything wrong so she must be the one with the issue. The walls of defense gradually begin to erect themselves. You think "Fine, if she wants to avoid me, I'll just avoid her." Yes, it sounds so immature but that is your initial thought. You think it's safer to keep your distance. It's the easiest way to avoid those feelings of rejection.
But then, something happens. The Holy Spirit begins to soften your heart. You realize that though that response would be easier and most comfortable, it is not the response that God wants. You agree that it's petty, immature, unloving, and cowardly. You whisper a prayer for strength and courage to do what goes against your natural instincts. You conclude that you will pursue her. Not in an annoying, you can't ever get away from me sort of way...but in an effort to extend yourself...to reach out to her...to love. You decide that you will make the effort that she does not seem to want to make and you will see how she responds. You do not plan to force yourself on her, you just plan to say "Hello, how are you?" What's the worst thing that could happen, right? You remind yourself that Christ himself was rejected by men. He was perfect in love and in character and he always said and did the right thing...yet people rejected him. He loved and people refused to accept his love. He did great things for people and some were so careless they didn't take the time to thank him. People will sin. Every one of us.
I have learned (and continue to learn) that loving my neighbor as myself means not giving them the treatment that they give me. That often means that I will have to refuse to give in to my feelings and the way I naturally want to react to things. I have to choose to obey God in those moments. He has to be the one that I love most. I have to know that the worst thing I can do is respond is the same manner as the other person...avoid, withdraw emotionally, act like nothing is wrong...these kinds of responses weaken our relationships. It takes courage and hope in God to rise above that and to respond in his way. Love others, even when it seems like they aren't loving you back...and see God working as relationships are being built and strengthened rather than being destroyed.
Jesus said...
"As you wish that others would do to you, do so to them. If you love those who love you, what benefit is that to you? For even sinners love those who love them. And if you do good to those who do good to you, what benefit is that to you? For even sinners do the same. And if you lend to those from whom you expect to receive, what credit is that to you? Even sinners lend to sinners, to get back the same amount. But love your enemies, and do good, and lend, expecting nothing in return, and your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most High, for he is kind to the ungrateful and the evil. Be merciful, even as your Father is merciful."
Luke 6:31-36
Linking up for the writing prompt here: http://www.ellenstumbo.com/on-her-own-terms/
Oh this is beautiful, and timely for me in some ways, so thank you :)
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