What's big sis up to?

Our transition into a structured day of homeschooling has actually gone quite well.  It seems that every one or two years our family life changes a bit and we have to make adjustments.  One wonderful change this year has been to spread out my kids into different rooms so there is minimal distraction and we get more accomplished in less time.  It is working out great and I hope to continue the pattern when we move into our home.

I work with Clara, my first-grader, first thing in the morning and it has worked well to bring Isabel and Manny with us into the playroom to color or play while I teach Clara her lessons.  While we are tucked away in there, my other children are busy about accomplishing all of the work that they can do on their own, in the various rooms I have assigned them to

.  

This morning, as the morning work was almost finished and it was time for the kids to get dressed to go outside and play (yes, sometimes we do school in our pajamas), Isabel followed me into the main room to see what her big sisters were up to...

Brienne likes to get creative and do things that are out of the ordinary.  That is why instead of sitting at the table in a chair, she would rather sit on an ottoman in front of a piano bench.  ;)  

Of course, she was happy to have Isabel join her and to pull out some stickers just for fun.

Sisters.  So sweet.

I love to watch them together...it brings my heart such joy.

Don't apologize for the mess

Life lately is quite the crazy adventure.  Yesterday afternoon, there were big plans to lug four loads of laundry to the laundromat.  These plans were hindered by the exciting conversation Amera and I were having concerning our schedule for the new school year.  Some of the first things to figure out were: what time to get up? who showers when? (with one shower) and when to have personal and family time in the Bible?  Things are definitely going to be more structured in the coming days.  To be honest, in many ways I long for that.

So Amera and I were bouncing ideas off of each other and trying to get all this daily life stuff figured out.  She has all of these great ideas and plans to teach her siblings the Bible every other week.  I am so excited to give her a chance to implement them!  I am also excited to teach them more regularly than I have been lately.  So many plans to get excited about!  So, anyway, it was getting later in the afternoon and...remember those four loads of laundry?  Well I was just about to get up and go when my husband comes bursting in the door saying "Marisha, we need to go look at a house!"  So I jumped up, grabbed what I needed and headed out the door.  It was not the first time and it won't be the last.  It's exciting, it's disappointing...it's an all around adventure.  The search for our home continues.

No matter where we make our cozy abode, life will be happening.  Real life.  Life that sometimes gets messy.  Life that we don't always have time to keep up with.  Life that doesn't feel "normal".  Oh sure, schedules are good and all but I know all too well that some days they will completely fall apart.  Life will happen.  The unexpected will come up.  We will have to do our best to be flexible, go with the flow and just do our best.

I finally made it to the laundromat.  I took three children to help me and we finished just in time to rush home and heat up leftovers for dinner.  After dinner I had to run to the store to get diapers and school supplies for next week.  It was my first time driving to Target alone.  By the time I left it was after 10pm, it was dark out so things looked different and I had to try and remember how to get back home.  I didn't have a phone with me or I would have just called Javier for directions.  Thankfully, I recognized many of the street names from driving around looking at houses and I was able to find my way eventually.  All of this made for a late evening without much getting done on the home front.  All that to say, today the saga continued as late nights make for late mornings.

There are things around here that don't always get cleaned up or put away right away.  I cannot always put life on hold for that.  I'd like to say that I live in a spotless and mess-free environment but it's far from the truth.  I don't like messes and I spend a lot of time eradicating them.  But I am learning that sometimes they just have to wait.  More important things are happening.  Like the sweet morning I enjoyed just smiling and loving on my kids as we ate our breakfast cereal.  Like the excitement of showing Manny the new flashcards I got for him last night.  We enjoyed going through those.  It didn't take place in an immaculate home that looks like something out of Better Homes and Gardens either.  It looked more like this...

See, I could have fooled you a little bit and only shown you the first picture.  But, this was my morning.  I should have taken the photo with all my sweet children smiling around the table...yeah, that would've been better and then you'd understand why I let the mess wait a bit.  ;)  

You know, on a little side note, it's times like these that I usually receive unexpected visitors.  There are times (although probably rare!) when everything is neat, tidy and orderly but does anyone unexpected come over then?  Of course not!  

A sweet friend came over today to see if I needed anything from the store.  The kids and I hadn't started the "clean up party" just yet and I resisted the temptation to apologize for things being a bit messy.  It is a powerful urge because everything in me wants to say "Please don't think that I am comfortable with crumbs on the floor.  Really, ants are not my friends.  I was actually just about to clean up in here."  But I've learned it's better to just not mention it.  Better to just focus on being a friend and ignore it while they are there.  I was happy to have the time to visit with her and not make it an issue.  I had already resolved in my heart about a year ago that I would never again apologize for the messes our sweet life produces.  They happen, they are normal, and they can't always be cleaned up right away.  Sometimes people take precedence...especially little people.  :)

I'll leave you with a few sweet photos of Isabel and Clara from this morning.  Isabel calls Clara "Kah" and she was doling out the kisses and the cheesy smiles.

There is so much to love about being a mom to these precious little ones.  Sometimes the cleaning just needs to wait a little.  It'll always be there anyway.  These amazing children, however, are growing up fast!

When you've had one of those days

Your trials can be like trails that lead to spiritual maturity.  But there are other 

paths that wind and twist and never seem to get you anywhere but lost.

I don't know about you but when I go through challenging times and difficult experiences in my life, I just want to get them over with.  I'm sure I'm not the only one to have one of those days that seem to go wrong from the very start.  And it often seems to happen when I am especially tired and feeling low on patience.

The kind of trials I am talking about are of the everyday sort.  Why is it that those kind can seem to be the hardest to endure?  I'm talking about the kind of day where not only are you struggling personally to have the right attitude about everything going on around you but you also have other little attitudes to correct and steer in the right direction.

And on top of these struggles there are also little mishaps that suddenly seem bigger than usual, like a cup that was accidentally knocked over, spilling sticky juice all over the freshly mopped floor.  Like the mud from the backyard that sticks into every crevice on the bottoms of sneakers and gets tracked into the house making you wonder why on earth white carpet was even invented!

It's one of those days when you are already running behind schedule (just pick a reason) and a child is struggling to understand a math concept and not only are they near tears but so are you.  There is also the toddler that seems to cry out as soon as you gain some traction with whatever you were trying to accomplish at that moment.  These are just a few of the things that challenge me on "one of those days" and they are usually accompanied by a pounding headache.

Oh, don't get me wrong and please don't feel sorry for me.  My days are not spent in misery and lamentation.  I have days where blessings and joy seem to be so abundant they overflow and if you lived in my house you would even hear me say "I am so blessed" as I shake my head and marvel at the goodness of God.  But some days, even when the blessings are still there, my joy is hiding out somewhere just waiting to be found.  If I am willing to search for it.

The question that plays over and over in my mind on days like that is "Why?"  Why are things so hard today?  Why can't I seem to get out of this slump?  I don't want to be grumpy and tired.  I want to be joyful, thankful and energetic.  It seemed almost effortless yesterday!  Why?

And I cried out to God and I ran to him, desperate for help because what woman wants to tear down her house brick by brick with a poor attitude?  It's amazing what you can accomplish in one day.  And even though I prayed, I still struggled, I felt as though I was slogging through mire all day long.  And I just kept praying and turning to the Lord.

You know that children's song that goes "I'm inright, outright, upright, downright happy all the time!"?  Well, I   have wondered on occasion if the writer of that song may have been exaggerating a bit.  I mean I love the hand motions and all the excitement of that song BUT... I'm not so sure that's an accurate description of the Christian life.  We do have so much to be glad about and thankful for but "Happy ALL the time"?

If you haven't noticed yet and no one has mentioned it to you, allow me to be the first.  The Christian life is hard.  It is a battle.  The desires of the flesh and Spirit are "opposed to each other, to keep you from doing the things you want to do."  Galatians 5:16-26  But we cannot give up the fight.  And God is with us to help us but we must turn to him ready and willing to take the steps he wants us to take.

I love this quote from a book I am reading called "Addictions" by Edward T. Welch:

"There is a mean streak to authentic self-control.  Underneath what seems to be the placid demeanor of those who are not ruled by their desires is the heart of a warrior.  Self-control is not for the timid.  When we want to grow in it, not only do we nurture an exuberance for Jesus Christ, we also demand a hatred for sin."

"Self-control" a fruit of the Spirit as well as joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness and gentleness.  What mom wouldn't say that she desperately needs the grace to exhibit these beautiful qualities every day, in the privacy of her own home?  And it is through these trials that we experience along the way, that God leads us to a place where we can see how very much we need to change.  And even just realizing that is a victory in and of itself because it shows that we are at least growing in the right direction.  But just knowing about our struggles and our sin is not enough.  God has us go through these trials so that we will mature.  It requires our cooperation and our effort.  We cannot just stand by, passively, expecting God to do everything for us.  We cannot do it apart from his grace and our growth cannot happen without us taking part in the process.  

I am learning to respond to every little trial with prayer.  Once I get over all the emotions and the tears and pouring my heart out to God, I need to seek him.  I need to plead with him to "Search me and know my heart!  Try me and know my thoughts!  And see if there be any grievous way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting!"  Psalm 139:23-24   I need to remember that the trials that I face are for my good.  They are meant to mature me.  I need to take this verse to heart:

Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness.  And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.  James 1:2-3

Each of us faces trials, sometimes daily, sometimes small yet significant, sometimes big and overwhelming, but whatever sort they are, they are meant to mature us.  As believers that should be something that we desire with all of our heart because we will increase in our knowledge and understanding of how to glorify and honor God more with the lives that he has given us.

Different perspectives {writing prompt}

When I opened my email this week to see what the writing prompt was, a smile spread across my face.  I've been thinking a lot about "different perspectives" lately.  I've spent time reflecting on my own perspective toward things like parenting, schooling options, and the way that we do things in church and outside of church.  And I find that, though we can have a very strong stance on some of our preferences, what works for one may not work for another.  And it's usually when our perspective clashes with a perspective different from ours that we really have to evaluate our attitude about it.

One thing that can motivate pride in our hearts is that we have found something that works so well for us...shouldn't everybody else do it the same way?  We have found a great way to achieve what we believe to be God's best and others ways of doing things become second rate or even unacceptable.

I have to admit, I get a little uncomfortable when a new parent comes to me for parenting advice and I feel as if they think I am some sort of parenting guru and I know all of the right answers to every unique situation.  I have not faced every situation. I have been at this parenting thing for a while but I am not an expert, nor will you be.  I only know what I have done and the results that I have experienced.  But that is with my kids.  I fear that though some of the parenting philosophies out there have been helpful to some, other parents end up frustrated and feeling guilty because it's not working for them.  It's ok if one thing doesn't work, you can try another approach and not feel like you are a bad parent.  Read books, think, evaluate, pray and consider your personal situation.  What will work for you?  Of course, I am speaking on matters of preference.

Being in a big family has given me even more perspective than what I had before because I find that what worked with one child does not work with another.  How much more from family to family?

If something has worked well for me, I'll share it.  But I'll say "This is what I did/do"  and maybe they can try that if they are inclined.  But I am not going to put forth my way of doing things as the be all and end all in parenting.  I have to stay humble and remember that though I've learned much, there is still more to learn.  Each of us lives in a different context and stage of life.  Our personalities differ and so do the personalities of our children.

As for schooling?  There is much to consider and the decision shouldn't be made lightly.  There is a great need for parents to step up to the plate and make the discipleship of their children the primary focus.  But that does not always mean homeschooling.  Homeschooling is not even an option for some.  And it may not always be the best choice.  Homeschooling doesn't even guarantee discipleship.  Even with my kids with me all day I can still get too busy with life and neglect to disciple them.  I understand the public schools and even Christian schools pose their challenges but I really think we are putting our own limitation on God when we say that homeschooling is the only way.  "Public school" doesn't necessarily mean "bad" and "Christian school" doesn't necessarily mean "good" either.  Do your research and think and pray through your options carefully.  I could be wrong on this but I'm pretty sure that God leads people in different ways.  It's true that there are many parents who send their kids off to school and don't spend any time discipling them in the ways of the Lord.  But there are others who do.  Homeschooling is not the only way to live in obedience to Deuteronomy chapter six.  I am certainly not trying to discourage homeschooling.  I am just saying please be careful about developing a perspective that thinks that it is the only option.

Sometimes we get so wrapped up in our current context that we forget that there are other God-honoring ways of doing things.  I was just talking with a friend the other day about the way we used to think.  She went through a time in her life where she felt that the only way to be modest was to wear a long and full skirt.  Everywhere.  Even while skiing.  I can also remember a time in my past where I might not have been that serious about it but I was buying into the thinking that stresses that a skirt is the only way to be the most feminine and godly as possible.  I don't think so anymore.  I think that a woman can be very feminine and modest in pants.  And in many situations it is the most practical and comfortable thing to wear.  It is often when our perspective comes face to face with another that we begin to reevaluate things.

Recently, in a book I am reading, the author talked about "family integrated church".  This is a church that practices keeping their children with them in a church service.  They do not have nurseries and he spoke very negatively about them and the parents who use them.  He believes that the nursery is "one of the greatest crutches in the church".  He also said that "Parents who have neglected to train their children have very little encouragement to do so when there is a place to hide them." (Voddie Baucham Jr., Family Driven Faith, pg. 147)

Ok, I get it.  There are parents who are neglecting to train their children to sit still.  Some have seen the need for it but perhaps they don't think it is possible for one so little.  We are dealing with imperfect people here who need hope and encouragement that it is possible.  He gives that in the book but I found some of his words to be offensive.  From my perspective, I am someone who trains my children at home.  I am in a context where we do have a church nursery.  My child goes there and is lovingly cared for and I can focus on hearing the message that God has for me that day.  And I am not unspiritual, neglectful, or irresponsible for putting my child in a nursery.  I am also freeing others from the potential distraction that could come as a result of bringing my small babies/children in the service.

I am glad that family integration is working for some it definitely sounds like it has its benefits.  But that is one context among many.  There are people struggling with parenting.  There are parents who would not feel they could sit through a church service with their kids.  There are parents who are training them at home and it just so happens that the child is not "getting it" as quickly as another child did.  And there are so many occasions for pride if we are not careful.  This is ministry and we cannot cookie cut everyone.  Especially when there are people who have just come to Christ and just walked through the doors of the church.  Are we going to tell that struggling, needy for hope and encouragement mom that we do not have an place to care for her little ones while she listens to the Word of God?  I am sorry, but looking back to when that was my case I think I might have turned and ran.  It's going to take time, discipleship and God working in her heart to get anywhere close to having her children sit still through a service.  Shouldn't we consider her perspective?  There is much to appreciate and agree with in this book.  The importance of a strong family unit and taking ownership of discipling our kids.  But in different families, places and situations that doesn't always play out exactly the way we think it should.  (You can read another review on the book here: A little more perspective)

What about you?  Have you ever found that you have held to a strong perspective on something but another perspective made you think twice?

(About the photo above: Brienne and I are learning to play guitar together.  Fun!  My "HP" laptop died yesterday.  Not fun.  It seems we are never a two laptop family for long.  Thankfully, I can use my husband's laptop.  The thing is, the only pictures I have on here are of Brienne with her guitar.  It doesn't exactly have anything to do with this post but I hope you enjoyed it anyway! :)

Linking up for the writing prompt here: http://www.ellenstumbo.com/different-perspectives/

A letter to my children {after a tough day}

To my dear children,

Your souls are so precious to me.  I will continue to teach you the Word of God no matter how bored you sometimes seem.  No matter how much you struggle with laughing at your baby sister and I have to stop and remind you to pay attention.  No matter how easy it would be to just overlook it and get straight to watching a movie instead.  I will teach you the Word of God and proclaim the gospel of Jesus Christ in our home.

Not only will I teach it, by God's grace I will live it.  I will fear God and take him seriously (as we spoke of tonight).  I know that he sees everything that happens in this home and in my heart and I want to honor him to the best of my ability.

You know how much your mommy needs God.  I turned to him so many times today.  I did not want to give in to my feelings.  I know how important it is for me to push forward through every struggle with strength and hope in God.

There were silent tears today and not just from me.  There were warnings, loving rebukes, encouraging words...me  affirming you and understanding that you are struggling because I struggle too.  Words of encouragement to spur you on to greater heights.  "I know you can do better, ask God to help you...turn to him like I do."  And we prayed together, me showing you the way.  Both of us turning to God, our only hope in the midst of our weakness.

There were so many opportunities to teach you today, to coach you, to redirect your gaze to Christ and, exhausting as it was, I did my best to take them all.

Oh, how I want you to love him!  There may be some part of me that wants this for selfish reasons...but I want this for your sake as well.  My heart cries "Oh taste and see that the Lord is good!"  I want this to become your heart's cry as well.

I know all too well that there is no true peace, no true joy and no true LIFE apart from him.

Remember the words I spoke to you this evening at the dinner table?

God has provided a sacrifice for you.  He gave his only Son for you.  He loves you so.

Take it to heart children.  Believe it.  It's almost too good to be true but God's gift of eternal life is free for the taking to all who will believe.

I could tell that you felt very loved when I went around the table and hugged each of you one by one and kissed your heads as I said your name and told you that I loved you.  My children, the love of God is far greater than mine.  He made you and knows your deepest thoughts.  There is nothing more wonderful than walking with him.  It begins right here and now.

Love always,
mom

If time stopped {writing prompt}

Any other moms out there make plans to do certain things as soon as the kids are all falling asleep in their beds?  That was me yesterday.  I had so many plans.  But it was only about five minutes after I sat down in the recliner to read that my eyelids felt like they weighed about ten pounds each.  I began a series of falling asleep reading a paragraph, and waking up to reread the same paragraph.  Have you ever tried in vain to keep your eyes open?  The desire was there but I just couldn't seem to do it.  

[ Joelle is reading this lately, I'm just a little jealous..;) ]

As sleepy as I was, I still felt a kind of sadness.  I miss the days when I would (could!) consume a book.  I miss getting beyond one paragraph.  Oh sure, sometimes in the middle of the day I will make an attempt to get a chapter in...and sometimes I am successful.  But then there are constant interruptions.  Children calling my name, children needing me, work that needs to be done...and it seems to call my name too...

I have so many things I want to do in the quiet hours of the night that it's often hard to decide which one!  I am enjoying the creative projects I am (slowly but surely) working on.  More on that later.  

But one thing that I really want to do more is read.  Not only because I enjoy it, but also because it helps on so many levels.  I want to grow in my understanding of so many things.  I want my mind to get more exercise!  I long to read those books that are collecting a little dust on our shelves.  Hopefully, in time, I will.

But for now, our own little story is being written.  And I don't want to miss a single line.

It's quite an adventure, let me tell you!

Linking up for the writing prompt here: http://www.ellenstumbo.com/if-time-stopped/

Being real {writing prompt}

I love how comfortable I am with my family.  We do life together.  We are not afraid to let loose and be goofballs now and then.  With family, you don't have to worry too much about making impressions.

If you were a fly on our wall...we would swat you!...no seriously...if you were a fly on our wall you would see me attempting either a Scottish, British, or Irish accent (maybe a combination of all three) and failing miserably--to which Amera says "Umm, mom?" with an amused smirk on her face.  Of course, she does the same thing from time to time.  She's much better at it than I am though. ;)

Looking over the past week or so, I can think of a few occasions where we got together and had some good laughs.  I'm not sure I could describe it to you but it's usually something that either I or the children say that prompts my husband to find some humor in it and then when he teases us we erupt in laughter.  I probably couldn't explain exactly what it is but it's one of those things where you just have to be there.

Although, I could tell you about a time recently when we were riding home from church in our van.  I was excited about an idea I had for creating something, so I was telling Amera (sitting behind me) as well as my husband (who was driving) all about it.

Here's the thing.  When I get very excited about something I tend to get very expressive with my hands.  On this particular occasion, both Amera and my husband found it to be quite amusing that I was using my hands so much.  We laughed hysterically as my husband teased me by making exaggerated hand motions and then when I resumed describing my idea and I was still using my hands the laughter continued as he reached over with one arm and held my hands down.  More laughs as he suggested that I attempt to continue...without the help of my hands.  Not even kidding you, in that moment I could not get the words out!

I love times like this.  Just being a family and laughing with each other.

You might not see all the humor in what I'm sharing here and it wouldn't be easy for me to describe all of the things that we have a good crack up over.  Probably because there are just some things that are only funny if you're here...and part of this family.

I love this freedom we have with each other to just be ourselves.  It's like no other place in the world.  This is as real as it gets.

Linking up for the writing prompt here: http://www.ellenstumbo.com/being-real/

She inspires me {our daughter, Amera}

Amera is someone that often acquires skill by simply messing around with things.  She doesn't typically need a book or instructions.  And she is not too afraid or intimidated by new things.  She loves a good challenge and she enjoys figuring out how things work.  She has taught herself how to use computer programs.  She begins with a desire to learn how they work and then she "plays"  ;) .  This is her approach to most things in life.  I admire her fearlessness.  I think that sometimes I am too concerned that if I mess around I will create a problem that will be hard to fix.  More and more, I am learning to set those concerns aside and just go for it. She inspires me.  It just amazes me sometimes how she figures things out.  She reminds me so much of her dad.

Amera is very interested in computer animation.  She is an artist and loves to draw.  I remember when she was four years old and she filled a little sketch book with drawings that her mom and dad bragged about.  Now we brag even more!  Ha! :)  Seriously though, it's such a blessing to see the gifts that God has given her.

She drew the flower up there in my header.  Then she taught me how to add color to it on the computer.  I love this girl!  She loves to help me with these things too, which is really sweet of her.

Please pray that Amera will be sensitive to God's leading and direction in her life.  Pray that she will use her gifts to glorify God and that she will determine to develop her gifts as much as she possibly can.  We are beginning to look ahead a little bit, looking at potential colleges that she might attend.  Pray that Christ would always be at the center of her life and foremost in her affections.

"We love you Amera and we have already seen God's work in your life.  We trust that he has great things in store for you and look forward to it all with great anticipation.  Always remember that your gifts are from an amazing God who loves you deeply.  Use them all for his honor and glory and may he bless your efforts to serve him."

When you know you can give more

This momma has been dealing with some illness over the past couple of weeks.  It's been off and on again and I have missed church.  I have had days where I do the bare minimum...just surviving.  Days where I am barely awake and I barely have the energy to project my voice.  Lazy days...because sometimes that is what you need when you are sick.  

Now that I am well and the kids are well...it is back to business as usual.  There are many things that we are striving to get better at and be consistent with.  I went to bed last night and woke up this morning with a prayer in my heart to God for grace to meet the week.  There is much to accomplish and there are things that we have to start taking more seriously.  Do you ever feel like that?  Like you just have to get back on track? Or maybe you've never been on the track, you just know you need to get on it?

Life seems to be constantly changing and it affects our schedules.  Yet, as I evaluate the day to day I recognize that there are things that will begin to slip if I let them.  Like special time with my husband and kids.  I mean time when we are not busy cleaning house and doing schoolwork.  It takes effort sometimes.  It won't always fall into your lap.  I'm not saying we don't have these times, it's just that I want more of them.  I had the sweetest time last night with my little ones all piled in the recliner with me and reading stories before they went to bed.  I am trying to hold on to these moments.  

After we returned home from church last night and all of the children had gone into the house except for Isabel, I climbed into the back of the van and sat next to her there in her car seat.  It was dark and quiet out there and she was happily drinking her bottle and lifting her little feet into the air.  She really does not have to try very hard to be cute...it comes so naturally for babies doesn't it?  I held one of those precious little feet in my hands...she was wearing tights which is practically irresistible to me...and I rubbed her sweet little foot and I just thought about how small it was and how much I love her.  How quickly time seems to fly!  

My oldest will soon be seventeen and I can hardly believe it!  All of this gives me an even greater desire to be more diligent in teaching them about my Lord and God.  I can do more.  I know I can.  Sometimes the time comes to evaluate progress and regroup.  That is what I am doing this week.  I want to be more consistent with meeting with them as group, not just individually.

I feel there is so much I must give.  God has given so much for me how could I not?  

Bring him your anxiety

I was up early this morning, seeking God in prayer.  Many things sought to draw my attention away from him.  I would not let them.  This early in the morning it is not children who interrupt communion but it is other things...like sleepiness...like the children's paintings that dried overnight on the dining room table and need to be put away...like the full laundry basket over in the living room...I face a day full of keeping all of the plates spinning.  Some of them I have to spin, some of them I want to spin.

There is much that I am trying to accomplish before we begin school again.  I am already beginning to feel the anxiety of a rigid schedule.  I so enjoy the low-key aspects of a break.  Time to create has been a gift to me.  But soon I will be busy at work on a new schedule that requires making the most of every minute we are given in a day.  It will be posted and I will have a pep talk with my children.  The life that we have lived for the past two weeks is about to change.  I want to make this change with prayer because I dread reluctance.  I don't like to think about facing any resistance from my crew, but I will follow the Lord as I lead them.  The tasks we must accomplish are given to us by him.  Help us Lord to honor you!

My studies in the book of Mark continue.  So many accounts of the mighty works that Jesus did.  I read of crowds of people who came to him.  I read how he healed them and rid their bodies of diseases, demons and even death.  This is the God I serve.  I do not have problems that are beyond his ability to help.  I do not have circumstances that are too difficult for my God.  He can help me with any and every single challenge I face...with every problem, every sin that corrupts, every anxiety that discourages...

I am running to him this morning.  I am giving all of my anxiety...all of my concerns...to him.  He knows about them all of course.  But I am turning to him for strength and courage to dive into the day and the coming week with enthusiasm.  His Spirit dwells within me and I need not fear.

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{I know I need to pull this back out and iron it, but I just had to see what it looked like in that frame!}

The pictures contain some things I created last night.  At first, I thought I would sew the fabric on.  I also thought I would have Amera paint the tree for the birds.  Then it dawned on me....GLUE GUN!  I'm so glad I thought of that because it was so much faster and easier to do it that way!

I told my husband that all I wanted for Christmas was to redo our bedroom.  Our bedroom doubles as an office.  The walls are lined with bookshelves and our dresser is home to our printer.  It is also a rather small space.  I have been organizing and creating pretty things.  I covered a boot-sized shoe box with some leftover fabric from the boys cloaks and it now stores all of the stuff I had in a few smaller containers.    I found a few sheets for about $3 each at a thrift store.  They are very nice and look like they were hardly used.  I wanted white in my room to brighten it up, so I have a king-sized white sheet for the curtains and cream and beige sheets for the duvet cover.  I also love brown linen so I found some of that at Walmart and plan to sew a strip of it on the inner edges of my curtain panels.  It's all coming together nicely and I'm having so much fun!  Time to start the day!

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...and later that day, I finished them and hung them on the wall...

Manny, I love how you...

Manny, 

I love how you say "C'mon 'Cara', let's play!" and you happily run off together to play with your toys.

I love how you gave Clara a big, sweet hug and said "Look mom!"  because you knew I would think it was sweet.

I love how you got so excited about this balloon.  You practically trembled with excitement.  You said "Look mom, it's up 'dare'!"  And you happily ran around the house with the balloon trailing behind you.

I love how you happily sit in the wheelbarrow while your big sister, Joelle gives you a fun ride.

I love how you play with your brother.  You make him laugh so hard with all of your crazy antics...whether it's a funny little dance, or the humorous things you say with your three year old voice.  I love watching you guys pretending to be super heroes, sword-fighting knights, cowboys, and kings of the castle.  You make me laugh with pure happiness.  

This very moment, you and your brother are the only one's up so far on this Saturday morning.  You guys are snuggled up on the couch trying to stay warm and watching a movie together.  I just have to smile.

I love how you jump right in with whatever your sisters are doing...even if it is "girl stuff".  :)

I love how you get this very determined look on your face some mornings and you grab your sister's old preschool workbook and say "I do school".  You plop that workbook on the table and get busy coloring.  That's your "school".  You are such a cute little man.

I could go on, but I'll stop there...for now.  There's so much to love about you, my sweet boy.  

Thank you God...this little man is so precious to me.

Different than expected {writing prompt}

"Different than expected".

Yes.  That really sums it up for me today.

There are some things that I didn't get to do today, or yesterday or the day before.  But little by little I am adjusting my focus.  

My husband called this evening, just as the kids were settling in for bed.  I admit, I was feeling a little sorry for myself and all the tough stuff I had to deal with while he was at work.  Within the first few sentences of my little "laundry" list of all the difficult things I had dealt with in a day full of just being a mommy...I realized that I was painting with a broad brush.  And in the process I was painting right over all of those beautiful, fun and downright therapeutic moments I had shared with my kids throughout the day.

We sang together.  We laughed long and hard.  We marveled at Isabel's little personality beginning to shine. We hugged, kissed, danced and played.  A couple of my children had outbursts of gratitude and told me they are so glad to have me as their mom and said "You're the best mommy!".  Yes, I know they are biased and I am actually the only mommy for them, but it's sweet nonetheless.  

But mixed in with all of this was the heartbreaking sin of a child.  There was also the mommy who sent a child to their room, while she went to her room to pray and ask God for wisdom.  There was discipline and the long talk that resulted in our family eating dinner around 7:30 instead of 6:00pm.  

I was able to put my older girls in charge of finishing up the meal.  Once the noodles and meat were ready, they realized that we did not have any sauce to go with them.  I wasn't expecting that!

I pulled out my Betty Crocker cookbook and found a recipe for white sauce.  Dinner was soooo late, but somehow everyone was happy.  The kids were captivated and watched as mom whipped up some white sauce for our pasta.  It was delicious by the way.

You know, I still have not been able to get to my major "room organizing" project...though I feel it's constant pull.  Nor have I been able to get to my creative projects...though I am anxious to do so.  

Right now, life is happening.  I'm living it to the fullest.  I'm the type of person that if I get an idea in my mind, I long for it until it is accomplished.  I get a huge sense of satisfaction when I complete a project.  But I'm learning that I just have to wait right now.  The right time will come.  Right now, life is more about the people than the projects.  And that includes taking time to build relationships in and out of my home and changing all the diapers and kissing all the "boo boos" that come this momma's way!  There were a lot of those today...I guess I should expect that by now? ;)

Happily linking up here: http://www.ellenstumbo.com/different-than-expected/

Learning to interact {Homeschooling}

You can't really talk about homeschooling without the question of socialization coming up.  People are concerned that homeschooled children will not learn how to interact socially.  This is a misconception.

If you are concerned about this, I would ask you to consider a child from birth to the age of four.  Has the child interacted socially during that time?  Are they learning to greet people and talk with them?  For most, the answer is yes.  Although I understand that there are unique exceptions to the rule.  But the point still stands, putting children in a classroom is not the magic pill that will teach them how to interact with people.  It might help, but is it the only thing that will help?

In fact, if socialization is what we are really after, there are other ways to achieve it.  Like spending quality time with the people you love and the people you are reaching out to in love.  Having conversations with people at home, people at church, people in your neighborhood and people in your community.  All of this can be achieved outside of a classroom.  And a schoolyard is certainly not the only place that children can run around and play together.

If you are thinking about homeschooling, you will have to think a little outside the box.  This concern that people have about socialization is just one example of how we are so accustomed to the way things have been done in our culture for many years.  It can be difficult to imagine how we could do it any differently.

The fact is, no situation is perfect.  My children are learning to interact with people, to love them, and to compassionately seek to meet needs.  But all of that will take time.  I'm sure it will be a lifelong lesson.  Not all of my children are extroverted, social butterflies.  But not all children enrolled in a public or Christian school are either.  We are dealing with human beings here.  Each one has a unique personality with their own set of strengths and weaknesses.  Each one is endowed with unique gifts from our Creator and life is full of opportunities to grow and learn how to use them for his glory.  That can happen in a classroom in a school building, but it can also happen as one learns, grows and experiences life at home.

Anyway, I guess that's my two cents on the matter. :)  What do you think?