"Is it ok that I'm wearing pants?"

 This past Sunday, I met a woman in the church parking lot as I was walking in with my family.  I had never seen her before and I greeted her with "Good morning" and introduced myself.  She was very friendly and after telling me her name, she said something I wasn't expecting.  She said, "I've noticed that all the women I've seen walking in have been wearing skirts and dresses.  Then she asked "Is it ok that I'm wearing pants?"

   I honestly had not even noticed that she was wearing pants, I just noticed her and wanted her to feel welcome to our church.  My first thought was of God's love for her regardless of what she was wearing.  In case you are wondering she looked quite lovely.  I felt sad that she felt discomfort over not being in a dress.  I assured her that of course it's ok and (speaking for my family and my church family) I told her "We are glad you are here."  I hope that she felt the sincerity of those words because I meant them.

   A similar thing happened less than a few months ago.  I noticed an older woman sitting a few rows behind me toward the back of the church.  The service would not be starting for at least five minutes, so I decided to go and meet her.  Right away, she shared her concerns with me about the pants she was wearing.  I gave her the same assurance that we were just glad she was here and it didn't matter.  I can understand the discomfort, I might feel out of place if I were the only one in a dress when everyone else is in pants but I hate to think that these women would think that we look down on them for wearing pants.

   I understand that there are churches that teach and preach from the pulpit that women should never wear pants and if they do they are in sin.  They are wrong and unbiblical.  Though I have never attended a church like this, I have attended three churches in my life and the established "norm" has been that the women wear dresses and skirts to church services and sometimes they wear pants on other days of the week.  This describes me.  Does this describe you?  If it does, what reason do you give?

   I have not personally met anyone who holds the belief that women should never wear pants.  I have only met them through websites, books, and the personal testimony of others who have met them.  What I do appreciate is their desire to honor the Lord by being feminine and their concern for purity and modesty.  What I don't agree with is the use of a verse in Deuteronomy to justify this belief and then imposing this belief on others.  

"A woman shall not wear a man's garment, nor shall a man put

on a woman's cloak, for whoever does these things is an 

abomination to the LORD your God."  (chap.22 vs.5)

   God made us male and female.  Each of us unique and created with distinct characteristics and roles.  It grieves the heart of God when we are not thankful for the way he has made us or when we attempt to blur the lines between the sexes.  One of the ways that people attempt to do this is through the way that they dress.  The fact is, there are women who try to look masculine, even wearing baggy men's clothing to hide the fact that they are women.  There are also men who despise being masculine and dress in a completely feminine way.  This is so sad!  I have a neighbor like this.  I can tell you that there is no gratitude to God for the way he has been made, no worship and no praise.  Women wanting to be men and men wanting to be women is a perversion of a loving Creator's plan for us.  It grieves the heart of God when people do this.  I don't think this verse is about women wearing pants, because pants can be feminine.

   Before I go any further, I want to mention the verses in the Bible that address women with the issue of modesty and the attitude we should have toward our clothing.

Women should adorn themselves in respectable apparel, with modesty

and self-control, not with braided hair and gold or pearls or costly attire,

(in other words, it's not a big fashion show, and it's not your primary focus)

but with what is proper for women who profess godliness-with good works.

1 Timothy 2:9

Do not let your adorning be external-the braiding of hair and the putting

on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear-but let your adorning be

the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle

and quiet spirit, which in God's sight is very precious.

1 Peter 3:3

   It's clear that God is first and foremost concerned about the attitude of our hearts.  As people we can often get so concerned with keeping up appearances and being preoccupied with our clothing and style.  We should put our focus where it needs to be primarily, on our relationship with God.  Our love toward him and our love toward others.   

   

  Allow me to share a personal testimony.  

   The first time I went to church, I didn't know much of what to expect, I had never been to one before.  One thing was plain to me.  I knew I had to find something dressy in my closet because I wanted to look my best.  As I looked through the options in my closet, some things were obviously not appropriate.  I had one outfit that I thought was decent and dressy enough.  A pair of black slacks and a purple silk blouse.  It was my best.  Over the years my "best" has changed.  I won't deny that it has been influenced by people I go to church with and fellowship with throughout the week.  People are just like that.  Who can really say that they are completely independent of influence?  But in this case I don't think it has been a bad influence.  I don't wear pants to church, but I do wear them on other occasions.  So the question is why don't I wear them to church?  For one, I consider my dresses and skirts to be the dressiest clothes I have and I also consider going to church to be a very special occasion.  A general principle woven throughout the Bible is that we bring God our best, so I am trying to do that when I come to worship.  

   I think another reason is because wearing dresses and skirts is the traditional "norm" in the churches I have attended.  I think most of us would rather not be concerned about it like the two ladies I met.  When I say concerned, I mean feeling like the odd ball because we might be the only one wearing pants or the concern that we may just be a distraction to our brothers and sisters in Christ even if we are modest.  

   As for the women who came to visit our church, I hope they come again and I hope they feel welcomed and loved whether they wear pants or skirts.  Wouldn't you agree?

[re-posted from the archives of my former blog // dated 7.18.2011]