The book that made me cry

{written yesterday}

My alarm went off at five this morning.  I rarely struggle to get out of bed anymore, but this morning was different.  I had been up a few times during the night.  Each time, I found Isabel lying on her back in her crib wailing for the pacy that she had lost.  It was hard getting up and getting going this morning.  But I never regret it when I do. 

After breakfast I was determined to finish working on the wreath I started several weeks ago.  I sat in the living room wrapping yarn around it to cover the surface.  I watched my children, content and busy about doing other things.

Little Manny was just hanging out, not really doing anything.  I asked him if he wanted me to read a book to him. He cheerfully said yes and hurried over to the shelf to pick one out.  I'll just confess it has been a little while...I don't know, a few weeks or so since I have done this.  Maybe it's how independent my children often are, reading and looking at books themselves.  Maybe it's having siblings who read to each other so often.  Maybe it's watching a little more movies than reading books lately.  Perhaps a combination of all three, but all I know is I really wanted to read a book to my little guy.

I opened the book that he chose.  Right away, I felt a little concerned with the many words upon the pages.  

"So much to do today!"  The living room floor was dotted with laundry baskets full of clothing that needed to be put away.  The bedrooms, that seem like no matter how often we tidy up are so often in need of attention.  How often do I spend the entire day doing everything that needs to be done and then find that at the end of it all I am the one who is spent?

So, I'm reading this book and with every turn of the page I grow more and more interested in the story.  Some of my other small children gather around.  I find that I am enjoying this story and I can tell they are too.  And about halfway through I get choked up.  I have to pause and gulp hard to keep from crying.  I'm not afraid of crying, I just want to get through the rest of the story, you know?  And when I come to the end, I do it.  I cry.  It's just that beautiful.  It touched my heart deeply.

Soon my two oldest came over to see what was going on.  Amera, with the look of surprise on her face, wondering what had touched my heart and made me cry.  I handed her the book, she sat down to read it.  Joelle eagerly awaited her turn.  Brienne put her arm around my shoulder, gave me a kiss on the cheek and told me how much she loves me.  And with tears trickling down my cheeks, I held little Izzy a little tighter and I just felt the most amazing gratitude for all the blessings God has given me.  I don't ever want to take them for granted.